The Five Things I Dig about Jesus

Okay, so the title makes me cringe a little bit. But I've been tagged by Just Jill to play this meme, even though I don't know what a meme is, though I like the concept.

And also she pointed out that it's time for my monthly post. Yowza!

So here they are, the Five Things I Dig about Jesus
1. With Jesus, once you think you're in, you're out. But if you feel like you're out, then you're in. The kingdom of heaven, that is.

2. He just did not seem, in the words of my colorful-language spouting preacher husband, to give a SHIT. In a good way. Got five husbands? Whatever! Unclean? Not a problem. Snot-nosed kid that just wanted to say hi? Come on over! Scribes and the priests coming to kill me? Well, that's a bummer. But go on ahead, I have power that you don't EVEN know about.

3. He can take all your crap, let you cry all over him and be a whiny mess, and then serve up a miracle that both takes all the wind out of your overdramatic sails and also brings tears to your eyes at how grateful you are for your life. Not that I speak from experience or anything.

4. He told everybody it was going to be hard to follow him. He did NOT engage in an evangelism program or a new member's class that talked about the great potlucks or choir.

5. That he loves me, no matter what. That he loves my kids, and I can tell them that, and mean it. For me, that's what it comes down to.

Only 30 days til my next post!!!!!

Shame

I waver between shame and shamelessness about not keeping this blog up to date. I also waver between thinking that what happens during the day is impossibly boring and I don't even see the point of documenting it, and thinking that I really should write, if for no one else but myself.

Anyway. It has been over a month since I actually have written, and though I have a few drafts of snippets of thoughts on things, none of them materialized into anything remotely publishable.

I have spent three days with my kids, with no school and no camp and no nanny, which is a whole other side story about how I see this mom of a kid in my daughter's class in places like Starbucks and the bagel shop and even carpool and she NEVER HAS HER BABY WITH HER and clearly I am a bit jealous but also just marvel at the way she doesn't have a job, just a nanny, presumably so she can work out and drink coffee a lot.

I feel like a complete failure and wuss. Three days has been enough to reduce me to a mess here, on the floor, whimpering because the toddler WILL NOT GO TO SLEEP and I just need an hour or so of silence and maybe some bad TV and sugar.

I know tomorrow will be better, at least for a little while. I know that I am luckier than many other mamas on the block, but I wonder if it's some failure in myself to not be able to spend many days straight with my kids with no programmed entertainment and not lose my mind.

So I'm going to take some time, now that toddler has stopped his monologue from the crib, to take some breaths, try to be in Her presence. Maybe do some yoga. Eat some cake, watch "So you think you can dance." To quote my favorite crazy wonderful author, "It isn't enough, and it is."